1995...
I guess I really have nothing to say.
Hmmm... except I'm pretty sure I still know everyone.
Andy Voelker, Will Wilson, Mark Voelker, Nather (something?), Megan Hall, Nathan Hall, John McKell, Teresa Sheets, Bryan Woody, me, and... dammit... Myra?? I forget the girl in purple. So there's that.
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Labels: bryan
1996
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b/c I like organizing and cataloging stuff... here are the photos I have on my computer from 1996. There is nothing special here, but a tiny piece of my soul is now freer since I will no longer worry about what to do with all these dumbass pictures. It is driving me more than slightly crazy that I don't recall the exact dates of all of these things. I have decided that it is ok so long as I can narrow it down to the month.
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These are pretty random... from a Superbowl party... Jan 28, 1996. I believe these people are Chase Slagle, Amy Voelker, Mark Voelker, and me. And then Myra I-Can't-Remember-Her-Last-Name, Whitney Hobart, and Bryan.
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Then there are these awful pictures from Easter of that year. I think the "youth" were supposed to be serving breakfast to all the old people or something. My mom and sister are in the first photo. Whitney is in the last photo, but I can't remember the girl's name in the middle. Once I start thinking about people more than 3 years younger than me, the information is pretty well irretrievable.
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Then there was the whole graduation thing. According to the pen marks on the backs of these photos, we graduated 02 June 1996. Most of the stuff I remember from this day is terrible.
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Me and Bryan beforehand. Someone said we had to smile. You can also barely see Richie's head over Bryan's shoulder. Camera hog. Oh yeah! And I have no tassle b/c I took it apart, and I just had a bunch of string in my pocket. That other really blurry picture is the good thing I remember from that day. My last tiny act of defiance to that shitty school. Shake hands with the Principal? I don't think so. Stop at the top of the ramp for photos? Nope. Fuck you, I'm out.
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Then the photo-op with my mum. I do like that I got that golden rope thing for honors or something even though I absolutely did not earn it. And then me and Bryan and my sister and my mom. I had to get out of that dress asap. And I sure as hell wasn't going to wear a suit underneath.
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I don't remember what the occassion was here, but this was yet another church youth group gathering. It was the week after graduation tho, and that cake says "seniors" on it. So, through my superior reasoning powers, I will state that this was a graduation party. It was the lake that was below my house in Spruce Pine. This place was actually pretty awesome, and I did not utilize it enough...
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Some kind of game was being played... football maybe? I dunno, but this is Swiss Pine Lake. It's a fake lake. But it was nice.
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There was food there... Somehow all pictures containing food also contain Bryan. There's Amy, me, and Bryan. Then me, Bryan, Nathan Hall, and Will Wilson. Then Bryan. As I write this, I am wearing the same flannel shirt that I am wearing in those pictures.
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Then I have all these random pictures from July of '96. But, for some reason, they were all lacking the Day from the date on the back. This caused me much consternation. But I think I've gotten over it.
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Some random trip to the zoo. Church youth group again. If it wasn't for John and Janice, I would have zero pictures of my formative years.
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| Bryan eating again... |
Me and Will trying to decipher the message hidden in the cupcakes. John looks on in disbelief. (He was the preacher at my church... I really liked them... wonder what happened to them...) |
Apparently they liked us too. For some reason they took Bryan and I to eat at Makoto's in Boone.
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So there's 1996. Some of it. Somewhere in there Bryan and I went to Great Britain. So the year wasn't a complete loss. And I got rejected from Davidson. And then I called them and was like, "wtf?" And then they let me in, and then I drove to MHS one night to share the news when I found out. For some reason I was excited about it. Then we moved to Hickory. Then I moved to Davidson. And eventually betrayed everything that I thought was worthwhile. *sigh*
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Labels: bryan
We are so Bad at Disc Golf...
A little over a month ago Bryan and I thought we were good enough to play the gold layout at Renaissance.  But we were not. Not at all. Bryan was set to turn 30 in about 2 weeks, so I'm going to let his excuse be that he was old. Mine will be that I felt sorry for him and wanted to let him win. Sound good? Good. Just look at the determination on my face here tho. I'm not sure I can pull of the "I wasn't trying" excuse, but I'm going to try. Despite the determination, I still ended up with a drive that looked like... well... like it was thrown by someone who can't throw a disc. But, still... look at that form. It's beautiful. Pay no attention to the thud of the disc hitting the tree. And yes, I know the picture shows a backhand and the video shows a forehand. So I cheated and threw two times. So what. |
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Then, of course, there's Bryan trying to drive.  Why does he always look so damn goofy? And how the hell does he manage to throw better than me with a form like that? But, you know, regardless of how the drives went, I'm going to go ahead and say that I made this putt. Even though I'm pretty sure I did not. Because, of course, I wasn't actually trying to make it. If you look behind the goal to the left, I believe that is Bryan's approach shot. But, then again, there's a disc in front of the goal too, and Bryan has this nasty habit of throwing everything in his hands at the goal if he misses a shot he thinks he should make. There are always discs all over the place. It's amazing we don't lose more than we do. More discs, that is. We are both obviously losing at disc golf.
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Even though we don't do mulligans... even though we've never really done mulligans...  Bryan always seems to think that he's allowed to take one. And perhaps it's karma, but the mulligans rarely seem to actually be any better... kind of like this one did not. But once he actually got out from behind the fence, you can see the ferociousness with which he attacked the next shot. Well, actually... that is probably the next next shot...
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Not that I'm completely trying to rag on Bryan. After all, he IS supposed to be the winner of this game. Even though the youtube fuziness makes it damn near impossible to actually see where this goes, this was a decent shot. Especially if you don't think about the fact that this was the 2nd shot on this hole and, technically, Bryan should have had to have taken it with his penis out.
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I know it seems like it, but I really am not only trying to make fun of Bryan. I'll get mine too. But this is just so precious. There's a little sign at the end of the teepad that says something like, "If, by some freak of nature, you miss the mando, you must retee." This was so close to being a freak of nature... One day tho... we'll see it...
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I think I recall saying something, after we'd finished the front nine, about how my score was equal to my course record and how Bryan's was 3 or so over the course record. After only being halfway through. And the 2nd half is much more difficult. It was a rough day...
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I think this is Bryan trying to describe, visually, where his level of play is compared to mine...
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Then he tries to put those words into actions and throws the disc directly into the jungle...
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While I, forgetting my oath to lose, go ahead and knock down this amazing putt.
(Although, in reality, I'm pretty sure I missed this as well)
Because, of course, I was actually remembering to try to lose.
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Now I know this throw looks beautiful. I know I look sexy as hell. And I know that you can't actually see where the disc went on youtube. The disc went left. Way left. Given the evidence of how gorgeous I looked while making the throw, however, it should be pretty obvious that this was on purpose.
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And then there's #13. I hate this hole more than any other disc golf hole I've ever played.  I don't understand why there is more photographic evidence of this hole than any other. Except, perhaps, b/c it takes so fucking long to play it b/c I'm so fucking terrible at it. I was even all down in my post-throw stance the way I usually do it when there's a good throw to be had... But you can just tell by the way I'm looking off into the distance... NOT happy. This went over the line of trees that is supposed to separate hole 13 from hole 11. They run parallel to one another. Sadly, this was not going to be the worst thing to happen to me on this hole...
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Bryan is always better at holding things together on this hole. If I come close to losing on this course, it's b/c of this hole. That held true this day as well. Although I'm pretty sure this resulted in a 4-point swing, it's not like Bryan had it completely easy. Throwing out of trees is never fun, and you can imagine him snapping that shirt thing like he was a woman who just got told that the mall was closed.
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Approximately 15 shots later, we can actually see the basket. Bryan, showing no signs of his age, makes a nice approach shot...
 Maybe his best form of the day. And his shot certainly ends up in a much much better place than mine... And these aren't nice oak trees that are fun to climb. No, these are pine trees. Very prickly pine trees. Very itchy pine trees. With branches close together... Not really the most fun I've ever had involving a tree and a frisbee.
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Bryan tried to use his big bear hands to shake it down, but the tree was nobody's bitch... had to find another solution...
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 I'm not usually terrible at 14 either, but this didn't work out. Bryan's standing at the goal when taking this photo. Pretty sure that I, yet again, missed. Although, come to think of it, this one might have actually gone in for a bogey...
Things kind of turned around for me on 15 tho... Bryan chucks his disc way way right, and I... well... you can see:
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Yeah... this is where my drive landed. The hole is right there. For birdie. I'll leave it up to you to decide whether or not I made it...
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As this game finally began to end, I was down by 1 with three holes to go. We had some memory left in the camera, so I guess I can let these next two videos speak for themselves.
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It is now tied...
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And now I'm down by two... wow. I usually love this hole. I often par this hole. But not today. Because, if you recall, I'm trying to lose to make Bryan feel better.
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So... last hole, and I'm down by two. My plan is working perfectly.
But now count the number of shots we each take...
and listen to Bryan's assessment of his score...
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I really don't know what else I could have done to try to lose this game. But Bryan still had to try to cheat to get the win. Real classy. And so, of course, I had to set the record straight. Perhaps had he not TRIED to cheat, I would have cheated for him so that he could feel better about himself. But this kind of brazen disrespect for the game would not stand. Maybe next time... maybe.
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Labels: bryan, Disc Golf
filboyd studge @ the Bucket
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Right. So Scott came into town this past weekend, and we knew what we were gonna do, by God. Get the band together. With Thomas filling in our rotating bass player slot. But then Thomas went to China of all places b/c he hates us. Moo Goo Gai Motherfucker. Or maybe that's Japanese. I don't know. Regardless, Eston said he'd take the job since we were the best band he'd ever heard...
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Scott says my recall is fading... he might be right. I'm pretty sure that Allison and I started everything off... we played Aeroplane Over the Sea again for Scott and Raven. We really wanted to do it like Dustin, but we're not quite good enough. But it was still quite serviceable since Allison is such a good singstress. I bet there are pictures somewhere, but I don't have any... then Eston did his solo intro stuff to, you know, butter-up the crowd. The opener has to suck so that the headliner sounds awesomer. (Yes, open mic night can have a headliner... even if they play in the middle.)
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I can only imagine that Eston and Sarah are missing from this incredibly cute shouldabeenatriology set o' photos b/c Bryan doesn't know Sarah. Which is too bad.
But so it goes.
<---- me & Allison
Scott and Raven ---->
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But anyway... there weren't actually many photos on my camera of things that actually happened during the concert, and I don't feel like screen-cap'ing the video. So this is pretty much all I've got as far as still images go. I had to lighten them in Photoshop, but I like the red tint that was naturally there...
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heh... And Raven praying at the altar of studge.
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I'm feeling narcissistic today... I'm pretty sure these photos mean that I done good.
Plus, it's almost like I'm smiling.
And I really like that first one. For obvious reasons. It so totally makes it look like I'm not even anywhere close to going bald.
Allison says I look like a child molester.
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This here is the closest thing I have to a picture with everyone in it... You can barely see Sarah over Brian's left shoulder... Allison's hitting on Eston behind Scott and Brian, and Raven's trying to avoid the whole thing by keeping her eyes closed. I guess she's kind of like an ostrich that way.
I guess I'm not in this picture... nor is Judith... nor is Bryan... I don't think I knew anyone else that was there tho. Except, of course, for Christy the lovely bartender.
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Scott trying to look all academic after the show...
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And then hanging with a friend who is unknown to me. I think this dude's name was Matt...?
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And then there's this Raven girl. She lives in New York. On the morning of the show, she was in New York. On the afternoon of the show, she was in New York. An hour before the show, she was in North Carolina. Rad? Yes. That's pretty freakin' rad. I'm pretty sure this photo says, "Holy fuck, I am so freakin' happy to be at Jeff's Bucket Shop right now!"
And I reckon that's Sarah and Eston there in the background again.
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And this is Allison and Raven acting happy after the show even tho the only thing either of them really wants is for filboyd studge to never stop playing ever.
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And I suppose that just leaves us with the last few obligatory band photos...
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Well... and then, of course, the video of the whole thing that Bryan cooked up for us...
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Labels: Allison, bryan, Eston, filboyd studge, Raven, Sarah, Scott
As I said... it snowed... Brooke didn't have to teach, and Allison got out of work, so I reckon that seemed like a good enough idea for a party. type thing. I didn't really plan on having any photos. But Bryan has this thing for my camera, so I ended up with almost 100 pictures. I edited as best I could. You're welcome.
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What the fuck. Another party? Do you remember how drunk I was last night? You guys are ridiculous.
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- Ok, fine... I'm in.
- Holy shit. Why do I always get drug into this crap? You guys are lucky it's so damned cold in Boone.
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A party? Can we make fun of Bryan when he inevitably does something ridiculous? I am so there.
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Wait a minute... we weren't supposed to start drinking yet? What kind of "party" is this..... fuck it. We'll look cute anyway. Because Bryan handles that camera so well.
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This is what happens when you get old. Getting drunk while playing a game is a nice side-effect. As opposed to the actual point of the game. Or, perhaps if I was more honest, playing a game is a side-effect of getting drunk. The point of this is simply that you no longer get to play "drinking games."
Wow. I'm sorry you had to read that.
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hmmm... yeah. fuck it. I'm out. Enjoy your bored games. Some of us have real jobs. Kind of. Losers.
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Seriously. You guys are lame. I'm going to lick myself now.
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Wow. What was that Dog's Eye View song called again?
I hope no one gets that...
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Hmmmm... Now how do I put things back together...
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I know! I'll reach for something at the same time as the new girl and make her blush!
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(See? That totally worked)
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Oh yeah... Even *I'm* smiling... try to explain that away...
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- I am so glad to be on the winning team...
- And I can't believe you guys traded me and made me replace Brooke. This is bullshit. But this party is still too awesome to not smile.
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This? This is Jen. We are snacking.
(I didn't know you got the munchies from drinking)
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Sadly, this is the only photographic evidence that Bryan even attended. Apart from the nine million photos he himself actually took.
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Thomas knows something that I don't... those Chex Mix? I had no idea...
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They make you fly.
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I don't know how I survived that aerial assault. Nor how I managed to live through knowing that I caused all these people that I like that kind of mental anguish by making them sit around my house for that long. Only Brooke was the smart one.
Maybe someone else can take care of this damned football thing that's coming up.
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Labels: Allison, Brooke, bryan, Charlotte, Jen, Thomas
Marathon Golf
6:30 AM -> Wake Up
6:30 - 7:30AM -> Dick Around Long Enough to Actually Wake Up; Make Coffee; Leave for Renaissance Gold.
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Renaissance Park. Gold. Perhaps the most difficult course in the Charlotte area. And we chose to play it in 32 degree weather at 7:30 AM. On Saturday. So it goes. It was cold. Bryan doesn't usually get cold. Maybe this proves that it was cold. It was, in fact, cold enough to attempt to throw while wearing gloves... as you can tell from my demonstration of how to make sure your glove and disc match up prior to the throw...
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Unfortunately, the gloves were a bad idea... this is what happens when you play disc golf with gloves on...
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One thing about freeze-your-balls-off-early-as-hell disc golf is that it seems to make you kind of stupid. If you will, please, note the amount of stuff in Bryan's left hand. I'm pretty damned sure this is only hole 2 and we're already suffering... I'm also pretty damned sure this shot didn't go in.
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Of course then, I, being the intelligent young man that I am... take no heed of the lesson taught by Mr. Woody. Instead I go ahead and putt while hanging onto an open laptop bag in the other hand. In my defense, there was not yet a bottle of wine in this bag to weigh me down. Also in my defense, I made it. ->-> (What a cool fucking picture tho, huh? I dunno how Bryan managed to time that right to get the chains in mid-motion...)
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The sad part is that, although I made that putt, it was my SEVENTH shot on hole number seven. (I know it says eight on the thing... trust me.) And Bryan got a 5. Seemed to me that the first hole of the day where Bryan get the box deserves some sort of celebration.
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On hole 9, I think I had my best drive ever. This is it.
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Just under two hours later, Renaissance is behind us with some of the worst scores in a long long time. Positive 29? Not cool. But regardless. We made it. And Hornet's Nest was waiting... zipped up I-77 and arrived rejuevenated and ready to roll. (Please note the super-fly Amsterdam shirt that Bryan's sporting) Oh. And we stopped at the Food Lion. A bottle of wine for me, and a six-pack of extra alcohol Spark beers for Bryan... I think 2 managed to survive the trip...
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Once it became warmer, it seemed like one of our goals quickly became getting a photo with the disc just released... There are many of these to come. This was, I believe, the first.
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A study in the comparisson of throwing styles on Hornet's Nest #12.
We didn't even play the Web layout. Because we suck.
I've NEVER played the entire Web layout properly. Dammit.
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This is what I was talking about. I think these are holes numbered 14, 15, and 16 in a row. Bryan was determined to get that post-throw shot. It actually worked out quite well, I think. And wtf. Why do I always put my back knee on the ground when throwing forehand?
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On the left, Bryan's second shot on 16... on the right, Bryan's drive on 17. I mostly thought the trees and stuff were really pretty on this one...
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And lastly, my second shot on #18... It was a great drive and sucked to be back in the woods. Somehow my fruity little throw got me up to the hole and in for Par. (Bryan had a shit drive, but an amazing 2nd shot and putt to sink Par as well.)
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And that was about that at Hornet's. More not-so-great scores, but I suppose it could have been worse. Next up: Sugaw. All par 3's, and a pretty easy course. Half a bottle of wine and a pair of Sparks should help matters... maybe... Here's a couple of Bryan showing me how to drive... What form!
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Now I'm showing him how to drive. Backhand. I SUCK at backhands. (apparently, I also suck at thinking... I just realized that I had the wrong picture here... now it's correct.)
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Now for putting... Bryan thinks it works if you throw it at your opponent. Me, on the other hand... I know that a slam dunk is a very high percentage shot. (Thank you, NBA2k)
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And lastly, in case you forgot, I like to put my right knee on the ground for some reason... It looks like this was probably a terrible shot. Why the hell am I throwing it so far up in the air???
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Sugaw was... decent. At least it wasn't another 29 over. I think I can beat this course... this was only the 2nd (perhaps 3rd) time I've tried it tho. Next time, it's mine. With most of the alcohol gone, however, Reedy Creek became somewhat of a playground. And I decided that it was now warm enough to wear flipflops. Idiot.
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Luckily for you, the battery in the camera was dying... So we're left with Bryan fighting his way out of the woods and me... looking like I'm trying to take a shit while throwing the frisbee. I hope that was a good shot, but it definitely looks like it's 300 feet in the air again. Ridiculous.
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I can't even really remember how things went down on Reedy... luckily there's a scorecard below. Unluckily, I'm trying to hurry, so I'm not going to go look at it yet and, instead, leave this randomness in place of anything pseudo real. Kilbourne... God, I love Kilbourne... Newly reopened and still lacking a couple of tee-pads, it feels great to play this course again. The posted scores on the course, however, are much different from those on the website. (which I used for the scorecards.) Last time we played, I was 7 under and Bryan was 2 under. Using the posted scores. Using these scorecards was a little frustrating. But I got this really pretty picture (albeit blurry) of Bryan on the non-existant teepad for number ten. And then, mostly to take up space. There's this. I feel like one of us - probably me... naturally - made this putt. Hence the photo.
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Although I managed to screw up the order of the courses... and we didn't get to play Veteran's due to a prior engagement (i.e. block party on Dorothy and Diana with free beer and food...mmmmm...) AND despite the fact that these scores are embarrassing... Here. Right here. Are the scores.
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Labels: bryan, Disc Golf
Scott's (and Thomas's) Birthday in St. Simon's
Stupid camera. I've gotten picture happy since I got it...
Scott's birthday was last weekend. And Thomas's not long before it.
So Scott and Thomas and Bryan and I converged on Scott's super-rad pad on St. Simon's Island.
Here's what happened... well, some of it.
| 06 & 07 October 2006... and so it goes... |
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And we arrive... Thomas and Scott have been slaving over the stove all day just so that Bryan and I can feel welcome when we arrive. So precious.
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We celebrate partially at some weird place that I thought was karoke. But it was an actual "band." Scott wanted to dance with some of the hot babes...
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...but he was too shy...
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and Thomas was too cool. Babes? Fuck that.
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After ditching the hot babes, we headed back to Scott's... where Bryan made himself comfortable, cards were dealt, and Scott became beligerent. (this is Raven... she made Scott's shirt. She doesn't like photos. And she's getting flipped off.)
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I'm not quite sure how this happened, but apparently Thomas and Bryan and I had glamor shots made. And I dunno why Scott doesn't have one. I'm pretty sure he wasn't taking the pictures or anything. Perhaps he was flipping people off while this was happening.
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Look, mom! I can fly!
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One of the many many... many... many. pool games played over the weekend...
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And the next morning, Scott lectures Bryan on the health benefits of showers vs. baths. "Stand in the place where you are!" "Your head is there to move you around!" (Bryan might get that reference, and Scott will think it sucks.) Regardless. This is a hot tub. On a screened-in porch. With a stereo. And a TV. And the water is just outside. Cool.
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After being too lazy for far too long, we manage to motivate enough to go to the beach. Thomas looked so cute with all his gear... and Bryan... Bryan's always cute.
---> ---> ---> --->
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Someone (probably Bryan) chucked the frisbee into the ocean far before anyone was ready to get wet. Valiantly, Scott went to fetch. Although it was probably to impress the girl sitting by herself on the beach. Her dog, however, had the same idea and went to get the frisbee instead. It turns out that she was from Savannah, so it was cool that the dog won the race.
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Unfortunately, no one was around to capture our godlike bodies crashing through the surf of low tide at St. Simon's. The whitecaps rolled in and over but couldn't phase our determination. Like modern day Prometheii, we brought light to the people. As they saw us struggle, man against nature, we conquered again... and again... and yet again! Despite the best efforts of God and Neptune, we still threw that damned frisbee. Back. and Forth. And Back. Here, Thomas is doing is best to capture the waning light of passing-godhood as it slowly drips off our bodies to sink to the bottom of the sea. Yes.
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| 08 October 2006... and so it continues... |
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Yes... technically it was the 8th, but it was really just the end of the 7th. I think. Regardless. This is the moon. The pictures below are also of the moon. Not the sun. The moon. The last one is the first time I realized that I could really raise the exposure on this camera. That's a 15 second shot... with me trying to hold the camera still by hand. Hence the shakiness.
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After a little too much to drink and a little too much regular pool, it was time for the super stupid pool tournament. I'm pretty sure this (as with the frisbee game) pitted me and Scott against Thomas and Bryan. and yeah... that's 30 balls on the table. Not including Scott's.
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Almost lastly... me. After, most likely, making a terrible terrible shot in pool.
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And lastly... There is no lastly.
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DISCLAIMER: Bryan took most of these pictures that night, which is why he does not appear in day 2. It's not any bigotry towards Bryan. Except for that last picture b/c he crashed early. That was bigotry.
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Labels: bryan, Raven, Scott, Thomas
Renny Photos
Saturday. 7:45 AM. I hate alarms. As does, I'm sure, most everyone. The sound of an alarm means, "Hey! HEY!! Turn me off, asshole! Now! And then hope you are awake enough to remember to actually wake up in ten minutes!" Usually I'm not. And usually I don't. During college, I took to sleeping with my alarm so that it would wake me. That didn't work. I made it to that class a full four times the whole semester. But this time, I was ready. And on a Saturday no less. After what seems like months of 100+ degree temps, Bryan and I are going to make it out early enough to do something other than just sweat.
And, fuck me, but the weather was beautiful.
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| We get to Renaissance about 8:15 and start heading out on the Go | |